Stewart-Colbert cheek kissFriendly! Platonic! And definitely no kissing at all!

Note that Miranda doesn’t say “that can’t happen because m/m romances don’t real” or “that can’t be true because my dad is 100% straight and I will never believe otherwise.”

At some point she spotted evidence that Cohen was also into men.

And her original, gut reaction would’ve been something like “this is just one more horrible betrayal of my mother.” The homophobic/biphobic miasma of society would slot right into the narrative she already had. But! Either this happened a while ago, or she found some good LGBT-friendly support to talk about it with, or both — because she’s worked through that, and gotten to a headspace of “he’s a person with a lot of issues and failings, who also just happens to be bi.”

Q: Miranda: Having successfully saved the day, Sparrow and Reseda, how do you feel? Does knowing that you managed to cock block your father’s budding relationship with Bennett in the process affect how you feel about it (being the hero)?

Miranda: What kind of question is this? You make it sound like being a hero is some new experience for me. I’ve always been the hero of this story. And it feels great, thanks for asking.

Sparrow: Did you not know? You’re totally an antagonist going through a redemption arc.

Miranda: Am not! That’s my dad’s role. I’m a protagonist with a tragic past, while you and your friends are the minor-villains-turned-wacky-sidekicks.

Sparrow: Suuuuuuuuure. Say, you didn’t answer how you feel about blocking your dad’s little romance with —

Miranda: NOPE

My dad is NOT having any kind of romance with that puffed-up wooden-faced inept talking-head. Not happening. They were having a friendly platonic sleepover with no kissing and no feelings! End of story!