Cohen: . . . so yes, it is possible to end the relationship with your, shall we say, “little friend.” But I’d never inflict that on anyone else’s “friend.” And neither would Miranda. Because when I — when I tried to do it to mine — all it did was hurt him. And I’ve regretted it ever since.

Bennett: Is that why I’ve never met your “friend”? He’s been, ah . . . recuperating, for this whole time?

— Hey, when we first met, I said . . . uh, the guy with the hoodie . . . should have his friend taken away —

— and you acted like you approved! What was the deal with that??

Cohen: What I said was . . . “Maybe you don’t know so much after all. But your heart’s in the right place.”

You talked about wanting to punish the sweatshirt guy without hurting his friend. You thought it mattered that our friends were protected — you just had the wrong idea about how. The same wrong idea that I had.

. . . except for the part about punishing the guy. Which, come to think of it . . .

Bennett: Th-that was just to get support for my bill! It’s not like I meant it or anything!